abused
I have always thought that bouncing back from horrible eperiences should not be that difficult. I have always thought that it all depended upon how positive a person’s outlook on life is. And once again, I am wrong. Once again, my logic has been proven deniable. Once again, I have proven my own self wrong, and once again, through a difficult and painful way.
I am being abused. My intelligence and my leadership is being taken for granted, and I am perfectly sure that my tolerance for this type of behavior has already reached way below the zero line. Instead of feeling intelligent and important, I am starting to view myself as useless and insignificant. It sure seems like nobody takes me seriously anymore. I am starting to wish I was born entirely stupid. If that should be the case, then whatever treatment I am currently recieving from other people becomes nothing short of fair. If they treat me better than they treat me now… dammit! Why can they not just treat me better NOW!
I am so thakful I got into Kalasag. Whatever I am gets appreciated here, is being put into perfect use (not underused or abused), and is being improved. The happiness I have felt in knowing that I am being appreciated for who I am has met its match not. I guess this happiness should be enough to sustain the strength of my soul for now.
P.S. I still feel damn worthless.
January 8th, 2007 at 10:59 pm
oh my god…
what is wrong with you??
you do not need to please people. you were’nt born that way. If you say you are a leader and they do not take you seriously, then be a leader and do what needs to done. make them suffer if you have to. But what, you deny yourself of that tiny satisfaction to show them that you are who you say you are. stop doing things in words. this calls for action!
You are way too negative and you do not see things that way it should be seen. i pity you for this. Again, you do not need others to compliment what you do. what you needed was recognition. you wanted to shine with what you do. you wanted attention. I don’t get it. i don’t get you. Why do you keep it so difficult for yourself? please let me know. i want to understand the you in you.